dress :: forever 21
shoes (very similar) :: swedish hasbeens
I've sat down to write this four or five times now and I'm honestly having trouble putting our elation and our relief into words. after almost three years of trying and failing, I can finally say that we are three this upcoming august! I'd get all obnoxious with the explanation points but I want you to keep reading.
like I said, we'd been trying unsuccessfully for nearly three years. I was without health insurance living on the island and clomid had failed us already. after returning from the caribbean, we decided to make an appointment for an ultrasound to see what was going on. because of our own schedules and the canadian health system, the earliest I could get in to see anyone was december, which is a heck of a long time to wait when you're thinking something is seriously wrong with you. with just a few days until christmas, I arrived at the ultrasound expecting a cyst or some physiological problem and instead found this sweet little jelly bean of a babe with a racing heartbeat. the tech quickly went to grab mitch who had earlier been told he had to stay in the waiting room. he entered bewildered and as the girl filled him in with the line, "and this is your baby at six weeks, two days pregnant." we simply looked at each other and started to tear up. not to sound cliché, but it truly was a christmas miracle. and to see that little heartbeat pitter-pattering away was one of the most emotional experiences of my life. and now that I'm pregnant, almost every experience is one of the most emotional of my life lol.
WHY WE WAITED
there are three reasons we waited so long to announce it to the world. the first is that mitch and I had struggled to add onto our family for so long that once it happened it was kind of nice to just spend time with this wee babe as just ours. we told our families fairly early on because it was christmastime and it was tough to explain our way out of trips down the ski hill and sushi dinners. for the most part, however, we kept it to ourselves and I'm honestly so glad we did it that way. the second reason is a bit more obvious. I didn't want to spread the good news and then have something happen and have to share the bad news. though now, I feel that at twenty-two weeks, I'm pretty much out of the woods (knock on wood). the third reason is that although this pregnancy has been so much easier than I could have ever imagined, I did feel extremely fatigued during my first trimester and it sort of led to a surge of apathy and laziness toward this little online space and for that, I apologize. I really want to be better because I want to document the time I have left with this little person safely inside of me.
ONE MORE THING
if you had asked me two weeks ago, I would have sworn to you up and down that this sweet, wonderful person I've been carrying around was a boy. I had very little nausea and no throwing up during the first trimester, but my skin was a disaster and I just had that overall feeling we would be adding a mini mitch to our lives this summer. until we were halfway through our twenty week ultrasound when the tech announced that it was a girl! I almost asked her to start over so I could see the whole thing over again with this new perspective. as we were leaving, I suggested getting a second opinion to mitch. how could my "mother's intuition" have been so far off?! but my medical student husband can read an ultrasound. he looked over at me and said, "honey, I saw the labia. I'm your second opinion." and thus, we will be expecting a sweet little baby girl this august!
as I'm finishing this up, the little person is doing flips. and all I can guess is that she's either ready for me to move my computer off of my hip bones or that she is already wanting second breakfast. either way, I suppose I'd better get up. have a happy tuesday, everyone! thanks for letting me share this big news with you!